WWE Recap: The Big Event (August 1986)

The Big Event was a bit of a strange show. It was just a glorified house show, but took place in a huge stadium, and drew 74,000 fans. WWE lists the show in the pay per view section of their website, but it was not a pay per view event. Mean Gene gives us the set up from a helicopter flying over the stadium, and then we go straight into the first match.


Jimmy Jack and Hoss Funk w/ Jimmy Hart vs The Killer Bees

For the record, Jimmy Jack is only a storyline brother to the Funks. Terry had left the WWF by this point, and these two became a tag team. Hoss and B. Brian Blair start things off. Blair starts hot, hitting an arm drag on Hoss, then bodyslamming both Funks twice apiece. Hoss backs Blair into his team's corner, but that only earns them both a series of elbows and their heads bashed together. After the Funks regroup, tags are made, and we get Jimmy Jack and Jumping Jim Brunzell. Jimmy Jack takes one hit, falls out of the ring, then tags Hoss back in. Brunzell hits a flying cross body off the ropes and gets a near-fall. The Bees make a couple of quick tags and remain in control. Brunzell locks in a sleeper hold, but Hoss breaks it up when the referee turns his back. Jimmy Jack gets in a few not-quite-legal shots on the floor. The footage skips at this point, and the Bees are shown pulling their masks from under the ring. It looks like in only skipped ahead a few moments. Brunzell and Blair switch places, since the refs can't tell them apart, and Blair goes to work on the Funks. He locks Hoss into an abdominal stretch, but Jimmy Jack clocks him to break the hold. As the ref turns around to force Jimmy Jack out, the Bees switch places again. Jimmy Hart sees it and screams into the megaphone, but the ref does not. Hoss tags Jimmy Jack, and Brunzell rolls him up for the pin. Winners: The Killer Bees

I loved the Bees' gimmick of switching places when I was a kid. Now it seems silly. The match was nothing special. The Funks got in only a little offense, and the Bees only used basic holds and some punches.




King Tonga vs The Magnificent Muraco w/ Mr Fuji

Tonga takes control early with a series of arm drags and a bodyslam, and Muraco escapes to the outside for a breather. He comes back in, but before long is tossed back out by Tonga. Once in again, Tonga begins working on the arm of Muraco. Muraco fights back and Tonga is thrown to the ropes, and as he bounces off, Mr Fuji grabs his leg, taking him down. Tonga turns his back on Muraco to yell at Fuji, which is a mistake, and Muraco takes advantage. Tonga gets tossed out of the ring, and Fuji, once again, gets involved, using his cane on the back of Tonga. This match sucks, and the crowd doesn't care about it. The two men take turns punching each other, but Muraco eventually gets control back. Then he rams Tonga's knee into the ringpost, drawing some heat from the crowd. He continues to work on the leg back inside the ring. Muraco then locks in the Figure Four, but Tonga gets to the rope to break the hold. Muraco climbs the ropes, but Tonga catches him, and slams him to the mat. Then it's his turn to climb the ropes. He hits a cross body, and pins him, but as the ref begins his count, the bell sounds. They've reached the time limit. Winner: Time Limit Draw

There was certainly no winner here, including the fans. The crowd wasn't into this match, and for good reason. It wasn't good. Muraco can generate heat, but the fans didn't care about King Tonga, so it didn't matter. Ugh.




Ted Arcidi vs Tony Garea

Arcidi is a power lifter, and it shows. He's massive. Garea wisely tries to knock Arcidi down with shoulder blocks, which would be like me trying to shoulder a brick wall. Garea gets in a few shots, then knocks Arcidi down with a drop kick, but he runs right into a bear hug, and submits. Winner: Ted Arcidi

This was another insignificant match. Arcidi is an impressive-looking dude, but that's about it. If the rest of this card is this bad, I quit.




Adorable Adrian Adonis w/ Jimmy Hart vs Junkyard Dog

JYD's entrance finally wakes the crowd up. The footage skips a bit, to after the start of the match. JYD nails Adonis with the chain a couple of time in the corner. He's then whipped into the opposite corner, where he flips up and over the ropes, and down to the floor. Adonis is pulled up to the apron by his hair, but the referee pulls JYD away. The Dog shoves the ref, and with the referee down, Jimmy Hart sprays perfume into JYD's eyes. Adonis drops a couple of knees to JYD's head, including one from the ropes, but can't get the three count. The Dog rolls out of the ring, and Jimmy Hart tries to attack, but it doesn't go so well. Adonis climbs the ropes, but JYD, with Hart on his back, shakes him loose, and the Adorable one falls crotch-first on the top rope. They wind up back in the ring, but Hart climbs onto the apron. JYD whips Adonis to the ropes, directly into Hart, and both men hit the floor. The bell rings, awarding the match to JYD. Winner: Junkyard Dog

I have no idea what happened. They announced the win was a countout, but that makes no sense. Adonis got back into the ring before JYD did, and the bell wasn't called for until Adonis and Hart went down together. It was another pretty forgettable match.




Dick Slater vs Iron Mike Sharpe

If you don't know who either of these guys are...don't feel bad. The crowd doesn't either. They booed both men, and I'm booing my computer for having to watch this. Sharpe literally yelled through the whole match, which was, thankfully, short. Slater eventually hits an elbow from the top rope for the win. Winner: Dick Slater

I imagine a lot of fans going to the bathroom during this match. If a wrestling match happens, but nobody cares, did it really happen?




King Kong Bundy, Big John Studd, and Bobby "The Brain" Heenan vs The Machines and Lou Albano

First, some back story. Due to some real-life injuries, Andre the Giant was "suspended" from the WWF. Shortly afterwards, a masked tag team called The Machines began showing up and feuding with Heenan's faction. It was obvious that one of them was Andre with a mask on, but Heenan couldn't prove it. Anyway, it was a gimmick that they had fun with for a few months in 1986. Back to the present, and it's Studd vs Super Machine to start. Super Machine goes for an early bodyslam attempt, but Studd blocks it. The Machines gain the advantage back, though, and Studd goes out of the ring to be thrown back in by Giant Machine. Both teams make tags, and it's Bundy and Big Machine in the ring. The two men collide in the middle of the ring, but neither budges. Bundy whips Big Machine to the corner and tries to follow with a splash, but nobody's home. Big Machine knocks Bundy to the mat, something that hadn't happened often up to that point. Things turn around quickly, and the heels take control. Studd stomps on Big Machine and then tags in Heenan. Heenan immediately tries to take off his opponent's mask, but Super Machine makes the save. Studd tags back in. They heels continue to work over both Machines, usually using illegal tactics. Super Machine gets in, but he gets punished as well. Heenan tags back in, but Super Machine tags in Albano. Albano gets in some offense, but Heenan pokes his eye, then tags in Studd. Studd takes out both Machines, then all three heels start to work on Albano. Here comes Giant Machine, and the crowd pops huge. He takes out all three heels, but the bell rings. Winners: King Kong Bundy, Big John Studd, and Bobby "The Brain" Heenan via disqualification

The heels win because of Andre, errr, Giant Machine's interference. The crowd got to enjoy the beatdown of Bobby Heenan after the match, though. This was ok, but still not that great.




Snakepit Match: Jake "The Snake" Roberts vs Ricky "The Dragon" Steamboat

There will be no disqualifications in this one. Steamboat got a huge pop upon entering. The punches start flying before either man even gets their robes off. Steamboat does run Roberts from the ring. The Dragon starts working on the arm, then hits a nice back drop. Steamboat stays in control for most of the first half of the match, hitting various chops, kicks, and arm locks. They wind up outside the ring, where Roberts takes over. He bodyslams Steamboat on the floor, then drives a couple of knees to the head. The Snake goes for a chair, but Steamboat blocks it and bashes Jake over the head with it. He throws him back into the ring, then climbs the to the top rope. He hits a punch from the top, but Roberts kicks out of the pin. Steamboat goes back to work on the arm. He gets Roberts in the corner for a series of chops, then attempts to whip him into the opposite corner, but the Snake reverses it and Steamboat goes flying out of the ring. Roberts chases him out and slingshots the Dragon into the ringpost. As he tosses Steamboat back into the ring, we see that he's busted open. Roberts hits a big clothesline, then goes for the DDT, but Steamboat blocks it. Roberts makes him pay with a reverse atomic drop. Roberts goes for the pin, but at the count of two, Steamboat reverses it and gets the three count instead. Winner: Ricky "The Dragon" Steamboat

That was a solid match, though they are capable of better. The crowd loved the finish, and all of the moves looked great. It was definitely the best match so far.




Billy Jack Haynes vs Hercules

Haynes is wearing a generic pair of Oregon Ducks trunks. They go back and forth for the first few minutes, then Hercules hits a clothesline and goes to work with some elbows. He whips Haynes to the corner, but Haynes reverses it and they wind up banging heads. Both men go down. Gorilla Monsoon comments that the crowd was stunned by that, but they're just disinterested in the match. Billy Jack recovers first, and hits some elbows of his own. He hits a backbreaker and an elbow from the middle rope, but can't get the pin. He goes for the Full Nelson, but can't lock it in. Hercules is able to gain momentum and toss Haynes out of the ring. He brings him back into the ring with a suplex. He also hits a big clothesline, but can't get the pin. Hercules thought he had won, and Haynes winds up getting the pin on a backslide. Winner: Billy Jack Haynes

The ending was a bit clunky. He should have gotten the win immediately after Hercules thought he won. Instead, he kicked out of that, only to fall victim to the backslide moments later after trying to perform a neckbreaker. It was yet another mostly boring match on this card.




The Rougeau Brothers vs Greg "The Hammer" Valentine and Brutus Beefcake

Beefcake and Valentine (The Dream Team) attack immediately, catching the Rougeaus off-guard. All four men fight in the ring. Finally, order is restored, and the Rougeaus have the advantage. Jacques works on Valentine. Raymond tags in and hits a devastating-looking kick.The Rougeaus makes several quick tags, working Valentine over. Beefcake finally gets in and turns things around. The heels get a near fall, undone because the referee has the slowest count in history. The Rougeaus make a tag and hit a double dropkick on Valentine, but don't get the pin either. This ref should be sent to Siberia. Momentum switches yet again, and Jacques gets a corner beatdown. All four men get back into the ring, and the Rougeaus wind up whipping the Dream Team into each other. A top rope spot lands, but Valentine breaks up the pin attempt. The Dream Team clears the ring, and Valentine takes a few shortcuts on the outside. Back inside the ring, Beefcake suckers the referee into looking away while he and Valentine use a double-team. Raymond, I think, endures quite a bit of punishment, as Valentine and Beefcake take turns pounding on him. Finally, after several minutes of this, Valentine goes for an elbow drop, but Raymond moves. He makes the hot tag, and Jacques comes in ready to fight. He drop kicks Valentine, then Beefcake, then bodyslams each of them. The heels try to double-team him, throwing him into the ropes, but he avoids a clothesline, then dropkicks both of them at the same time. Jacques climbs the ropes and goes for a flying elbow, but now he misses. Valentine locks the Figure Four on, but Raymond breaks it up, and all four men go at it again. Valentine goes for another Figure Four, but Raymond comes and rolls Valentine up for the pin, despite not being the legal man. Winners: The Rougeau Brothers

That wasn't a bad match, it was just too long. It was decent at the beginning and end, but the middle dragged on. The referee was bad on an epic scale. Every pin took forever because he literally slid his hand back to check the shoulders on every pin, and in between every count.




Handsome Harley Race vs Pedro Morales

Morales strikes first, and knocks Race from the ring. Harley drags him outside the ring, though, and slams him face first into a chair. Then he headbutts him and runs him into a ringpost. Back in the ring, Race tries a suplex, but Morales reverses it for one of his own. He gets a roll-up, but Race kicks out. Race goes into the corner. Morales chases him, but Race pulls his legs out from under him and pins him with his legs on the ropes for leverage. The ref doesn't see it. Winner: Handsome Harley Race

This ending has been used several times, notably by Randy Savage. The match was short, which is a good thing. There was a total of one wrestling move used. The rest was all punches and kicks. Sigh. We get a "bullshit" chant from the crowd.


"Mr Wonderful" Paul Orndorff w/ Bobby "The Brain" Heenan vs Hulk Hogan (World Heavyweight Championship)

Orndorff takes a cheap shot, clotheslining Hogan while the ref was checking him over. He pounds on Hogan on the mat, but Hogan bounces back and pounds on Orndorff. The ref actually pulls Hogan off of Mr Wonderful by his hair, but Hogan knocks Orndorff out of the ring. Back inside, Hogan hits a clothesline and an elbow drop, but doesn't go for the pin. Heenan interferes, slapping Hogan, so Hogan leaves the ring, chasing The Brain around the outside. It costs him, as once he comes inside, Orndorff goes on the attack. This time, Hogan gets knocked outside. Orndorff follows and suplexes Hogan on the floor. He also drops repeated elbows to the neck of the champ. Inside once again, Orndorff continues his assault, kneeing Hogan in the back of the head. He goes for the pin, but isn't able to get the three count. Orndorff goes to the top rope and hits a punch, knocking Hogan back to the mat. He goes for a pile driver, but Hogan back drops him instead. The crowd is really into it at this point. Orndorff stays in control, though. He's now yelling at the ref, and he bites Hogan on the ear. He hits a back drop and goes for the pin, but Hogan gets his foot on the rope. Orndorff thinks he won. Behind him, however, the champ is starting to hulk up. He nails Orndorff from behind, and that also takes out the ref. Hogan hits a clothesline, then stops to play to the crowd. He sets up Orndorff for the pile driver, but Heenan runs in and hits him with a stool. Mr Wonderful covers, but the ref hasn't gotten back up yet. Orndorff is slamming his fist on the mat. The ref finally crawls over, but instead of counting to three, he pats Orndorff on the shoulder. Orndorff and Heenan celebrate with the belt, but the winner is announced to be Hogan. Winner: Hulk Hogan via disqualification

Orndorff loses his mind and begins to kick Hogan while he's down. He tries to hit Hogan with the belt, but Hogan blocks it and clears him from the ring. I'm not sure what the disqualification is for since the ref was supposedly knocked out when Heenan hit Hogan, and Orndorff did hit the ref, but that was Hogan's fault. It was a weird ending, and a pretty cheap one too.




Overall Impressions

This was a terrible event. There were bad endings, slow matches, and pointless matches. The refs were abnormally bad as well. For several of the matches, the crowd even checked out. This was easily the worst show I've reviewed to this point.

Winners: 
Dick Slater: He shut Iron Mike up. Jesus.
The Roberts/Steamboat feud: It was the highlight of the show, and continued a great feud.

Losers:
Refereeing: There were too many bad referee moments to mention. It was ugly.
Eyeballs: This whole card, outside of one match, was awful.

 


Things I Would Have Done Differently

This was in Canada, and Bret Hart wasn't on the card. Get rid of some of these matches between low and mid-card guys and bring in guys who can put on a show. Randy Savage, Bret Hart, and the Bulldogs were all noticeably absent.

Fire every referee in this event. They were all bad, some more than others.

Hogan should have lost.