Top 10...Bottom 5: Week 5
Week
five was headlined by Brady vs Manning, but there were a couple of other
anticipated matchups. The game of the week, however, wound up being in
Indianapolis (more on that later).
The week didn't have many surprises. Blaine Gabbert still stinks. Mike Vick still enjoys giving the gift of fumble. Chris Johnson still hits a hole like a limp noodle. On the positive side, Arian Foster is good. The Bears defense is a scoring machine. Tony Gonzalez is ageless. And Andrew Luck...well, more on that later. Here we go:
TOP TEN
1. Houston Texans-J.J. Watt is the unstoppable force AND the immovable object.
2. Atlanta Falcons-Welp, that's one way to slow down RGIII. The Falcons offense is scary, and not just because Michael Turner might suddenly eat you.
3. San Francisco 49ers-There aren't enough words to describe the domination on both sides of the ball in this game.Alex Smith Rulz!
4. Chicago Bears-I would never throw a pass against them. Ever.
5. New England Patriots-Two straight weeks with well over 200 yards rushing? What dimension are we in?
6. Baltimore Ravens-Since week one, this is been a wholly uninspiring team. If the Chiefs roll off a winning streak, will Eric Winston secretly send a thank you note to Baltimore?
7. Minnesota Vikings-Has there been a more exciting athlete with a nerdier name than Percy Harvin?
8. New York Giants-Is it an impressive comeback if you were losing to Cleveland in the first place?
9. Seattle Seahawks-Yeah, the offense is a work in progress, but that defense is just badass. Is it too late to nickname their secondary "The Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse"?
10. Arizona Cardinals-They get this spot by default for being 4-1. They are taking walk-ins to apply for starting RB.
HONORABLE MENTIONS
Pittsburgh Steelers-Hello Troy. Bye Troy.
Indianapolis Colts-The reports of the demise of Reggie Wayne might have been premature.
Green Bay Packers-Don't worry, Andrew Luck is going to do this to a lot of teams over his career, but more on that later.
BOTTOM FIVE
28. Buffalo Bills-This might be the biggest waste of money if free agency history. Should have just bought lots and lots of liquor for their fanbase.
29. Carolina Panthers-This is the worst-ran offense in the league. They have so much talent at RB and choose to run the ball so little.
30. Jacksonville Jaguars-When people are saying Chad Henne is the answer, you know you're not very good.
31. Cleveland Browns-Yes, I'm giving them credit for at least scoring some points. They played with Baltimore and had a lead on the Giants.
32. Tennessee Titans-Tennessee Titans-Every RB from now on seeking a big contract should legally be allowed to kick Chris Johnson in the junk.
MVPs of the Week
Drew Brees-Nearly 400 yards: Check. Four TDs: Check. Breaks another record: Check.
J.J. Watt-My first chance to watch and focus on him last night. He's unblockable. His quote as the game ended "They can't try to throw it over me" was hysterical..and true.
Ahmad Bradshaw-200 yards rushing. Decent.
Andrew Luck/Reggie Wayne-Let me say, the Packers are probably my 2nd favorite team. That said, on that final Colts drive, I was on my feet, mouth on the floor at the plays Luck made, primarily to Wayne (one of my all-time favorite players). I said holy *%#& more in that 10 minute span than any 10 minute span ever. Simply amazing.
Goats of the Week
Mike Vick-The gift that keeps on giving.
Marvin Lewis-Yes, this is a homer gripe, but that was a terrible decision to try the FG.
Chris Johnson-He's the first member of the Goat HOF. Had the nerve to say that somebody on the team needed to provide a spark.
The week didn't have many surprises. Blaine Gabbert still stinks. Mike Vick still enjoys giving the gift of fumble. Chris Johnson still hits a hole like a limp noodle. On the positive side, Arian Foster is good. The Bears defense is a scoring machine. Tony Gonzalez is ageless. And Andrew Luck...well, more on that later. Here we go:
TOP TEN
1. Houston Texans-J.J. Watt is the unstoppable force AND the immovable object.
2. Atlanta Falcons-Welp, that's one way to slow down RGIII. The Falcons offense is scary, and not just because Michael Turner might suddenly eat you.
3. San Francisco 49ers-There aren't enough words to describe the domination on both sides of the ball in this game.Alex Smith Rulz!
4. Chicago Bears-I would never throw a pass against them. Ever.
5. New England Patriots-Two straight weeks with well over 200 yards rushing? What dimension are we in?
6. Baltimore Ravens-Since week one, this is been a wholly uninspiring team. If the Chiefs roll off a winning streak, will Eric Winston secretly send a thank you note to Baltimore?
7. Minnesota Vikings-Has there been a more exciting athlete with a nerdier name than Percy Harvin?
8. New York Giants-Is it an impressive comeback if you were losing to Cleveland in the first place?
9. Seattle Seahawks-Yeah, the offense is a work in progress, but that defense is just badass. Is it too late to nickname their secondary "The Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse"?
10. Arizona Cardinals-They get this spot by default for being 4-1. They are taking walk-ins to apply for starting RB.
HONORABLE MENTIONS
Pittsburgh Steelers-Hello Troy. Bye Troy.
Indianapolis Colts-The reports of the demise of Reggie Wayne might have been premature.
Green Bay Packers-Don't worry, Andrew Luck is going to do this to a lot of teams over his career, but more on that later.
BOTTOM FIVE
28. Buffalo Bills-This might be the biggest waste of money if free agency history. Should have just bought lots and lots of liquor for their fanbase.
29. Carolina Panthers-This is the worst-ran offense in the league. They have so much talent at RB and choose to run the ball so little.
30. Jacksonville Jaguars-When people are saying Chad Henne is the answer, you know you're not very good.
31. Cleveland Browns-Yes, I'm giving them credit for at least scoring some points. They played with Baltimore and had a lead on the Giants.
32. Tennessee Titans-Tennessee Titans-Every RB from now on seeking a big contract should legally be allowed to kick Chris Johnson in the junk.
MVPs of the Week
Drew Brees-Nearly 400 yards: Check. Four TDs: Check. Breaks another record: Check.
J.J. Watt-My first chance to watch and focus on him last night. He's unblockable. His quote as the game ended "They can't try to throw it over me" was hysterical..and true.
Ahmad Bradshaw-200 yards rushing. Decent.
Andrew Luck/Reggie Wayne-Let me say, the Packers are probably my 2nd favorite team. That said, on that final Colts drive, I was on my feet, mouth on the floor at the plays Luck made, primarily to Wayne (one of my all-time favorite players). I said holy *%#& more in that 10 minute span than any 10 minute span ever. Simply amazing.
Goats of the Week
Mike Vick-The gift that keeps on giving.
Marvin Lewis-Yes, this is a homer gripe, but that was a terrible decision to try the FG.
Chris Johnson-He's the first member of the Goat HOF. Had the nerve to say that somebody on the team needed to provide a spark.
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